Pater Familias … because I'm your FATHER!

Never Again - Morning Homework

February 3, 2010 · Behavior | School

Do I really have to learn everything the hard way? Do you?

To Teacher, Pater Must Tell Shameful Truth

Damn you, Bonnie the Cat.

Because of you, I have to email Mrs. Taylor, Girl Child’s first grade teacher, expanding on my earlier scrawl on a damp page fragment in the composition book in which GC does her homework.

The note indicated that the missing part of yesterday’s assignment will be in tomorrow.   I two-worded the reason – household accident.

What happened was, Bonnie knocked over a vase of flowers on the kitchen table, causing water to spill out onto, among other things, GC’s homework book. Quick-thinking Pater shook off the excess and cut out a couple pages so wet they threatened others. The kid’s number problems survived. Alas, we could not save Language Arts. 

Right now I must email Mrs. Taylor, because GC has already – bet all you own on it – told her all about the cat and water and her homework. And that worries me more and more because it’s way too close to, “I don’t have my book report because my dog ate it.” Slippery slope, bro. Start stuff like that in First Grade, and it gets on the permanent record, forget about Stanford or Brown.  

Take me just a sec…

Now, back from emailing, I am surprised at my own refreshing candor and full acceptance of responsibility.

Blame me, Teacher, and not Bonnie the Cat. It was I who let my child goof around last night and do homework in the AM. Then, this morning, I only yelled upstairs while she stretched out selection of the day’s outfit for, like, 10 extra minutes. That meant she had to do an emergency hurry-up job of alphabetizing this week’s 12 spelling words.

Minutes, that all we had. Truth be told, Girl Child was only on word three when the cat knocked over the vase. By then it was too late to do anything but save the notebook and roll. 

Bad dad. Double bad because last night I looked at the assignment and knew we would be cutting it very close, time-wise. End of a crap-o day, you know?

Never, never, never again. We do homework when we’re supposed to.

More shame: Girl Child was officially marked late. This I know because we got a robo-call, reminding us to get our child to school on time.

Side issue: What committee of educators decided on this pretentious fuzzhead designation Language Arts? What was wrong with English, the language the kids are mastering, am I right? Is her Spanish class las artes de idiomas? Remind me to rant about this later.

Ever let things slide yourself, even knowing you'd be sorry? Go on, tell.... 

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